Synbios: Hero of the Republic
by Trurotaketwo
Summary: Chapter 5 is up. Synbios ventures to defend the Republic, now at war with the Empire.
1. Welcome to the story

Synbios: Hero of the Republic by Truro

Lord Synbios was in his office reading the various reports.

Food report, garden report, army report, health report, stock report, firewood oil & coal report. And a partridge in a pair tree!

He wasn't very keen on going through these documents. It wasn't because he found the job a tad boring. By all means no.

He found the job ridiculously boring.

He was fond of his new responsibilities of lordship over the city of Flagard, left to him by his father, in his will. But he was still board stiff.

Another reason he was unhappy at the moment, was because he had just seen the budget. He had to practically empty the coffers, when his army joined the quest to destroy the Bulzome sect. The modern man would think that poor Synbios had a teenage daughter who found out where his credit card was hidden.

He rang a bell, to summon his butler (or the medieval equivalent of a butler). Two seconds later, he entered the chamber.

"You're a bit slow today." said Synbios, "Would you Summon Sir Dantares, for me?"

"Yes master." said the butler in reserved speech as he walked out of the room backwards.

Five minutes later, Sir Dantares, second in command of Synbios army, and the strongest centaur in the kingdom entered the chamber.

"Good day sir!" he said, as he gave a salute. His voice was halfway between middle-tone and deep.

"I need some advice, Dantares." Said the young master (and I don't mean Jackie Chan), who liked to keep things informal. "The coffers are nearly empty. As my long time friend, and an experienced soldier, how do you suggest we fix the problem?"

"Well, you could ask your sister, the Lady Margaret of Malory to give you a hand out."

"Oh yes!" exclaimed his lordship, "That would look splendid, wouldn't it? The lord of Flagard goes running to his big sister when the going gets tough!"

Dantares looked around the room, trying not to make eye contact

"Well, why not ask King Bentram for aid?" he couldn't go wrong with that suggestion. Synbios had served the King well, during the war with the Bulzome sect, and Bentram was a great friend of Synbios' farther during his youth, so it seemed highly likely that he could he relied on for financial support.

"We can't. He's busy rebuilding the capital, after that fiasco with the colossus."

"You could raise the taxes." Third time lucky perhaps.

"Never!" said Synbios, his green eyes glaring daggers at the centaur, "My farther always kept the taxes the same, so that they were fair to the people of this city!" thee strikes and you're out Dantares.

"Well, the only other thing I can suggest," said Dantares, (who doesn't seem to know the rules of baseball), "Is that you go on a quest."

"A quest?" asked Synbios. Yes, the word is in Synbios' vocabulary, but he didn't get what was being suggested.

"You see sir, when I was younger, and I needed some extra cash, I'd go a little quest, dragon slaying, treasure hunting, catching thieves, returning lost toys to children, stuff like that. I usually found a couple of coins, when I was out and about."

"You mean go on holiday, and leave me land, without its lord?"

"It won't be for very long sir, and remember, we do need to put some money back in the coffers."

"You're right. I've got no choice. I'll have my horse (who's name is Alan) saddle, and I'll depart in the morning. You Dantares will be in charge until I get back. Make sure no one finds out."

"Yes sir!" said the knight, as he gave another salute. This was the chance Dantares had been waiting for. Synbios, he felt, was a bit soft on his army. As much as Dantares respects his lord and master, he was going to enjoy putting the force through torture and agony of boot camp.

All was nearly ready for tomorrow. Synbios had readied he armour, sharpened his sword, and even got round to baking some muffins for the journey. He had food, maps, horse, weapons, water, telephone money (Okay so he wouldn't EXACTLY need that last one). There was only one thing he needed. Something that he wouldn't be able to travel without. Something of the utmost importance, and its absence would make all his preparations in vain…

An idea of where the hell he was going.

You can't go on a quest, unless you know what it is, can you? So it was time for our hero to hit the books. Legends of ancient heroes, who had lead shining forces, before him, history of the surrounding area, travel logs of great sea captains, one thousand and one fabulous chat up lines (Well you never know…)

Dawn was breaking. Breaking wind. And what a pong.

AS the sun came up, Synbios dragged himself out of bed. He was quite sloppy in putting on his armour, having been up all night reading. Some of those chat up lines were pure genius.

Dantares watched as Synbios rode off into the sunrise. Now to get to work.

He paraded through the barracks blowing the bugle as loud as he could. And considering what an enormous voice Dantares had, that was definitely saying something.

"Right lovely boys, I want you on parade in ten minutes, for special drill!" he roared, in Sergeant Major mode.

Ten minutes later, the force was on parade.

"You 'horrible lot." Sneered Dantares, "I've never seen a sloppier shower in all me life!" blasting the last three words at maximum volume, "All with scruffy haircuts, and who knows how many different outfits we've got on!"

"If I may say something Dantares, " began Obright, the dwarf,

"Shut up!" snapped Danatares, who's voice now seemed to be amplified several times, "By the time I am finished, you will think twice before coming on parade, looking like a bunch of scruffs…" he reviled his teeth, in a wicked grin, and chuckled menacingly, at his victims/troops.

Synbios was riding fast on his horse (who's name was Alan) towards the Destonia Empire; The rival kingdom of the land of Aspinia, run by the tyrannical Emperor Domeric. Having been unable to decide on what sort of quest to embark on, he decided that a raid on an Imperial lord would fill the coffers up pretty quickly.

But will our hero succeed in this adventure? Listen in, and watch out, for the next thrilling instalment.


	2. The Beast

The Quest

Synbios arrived at the small town of Montague; modestly named after the Imperial Lord who was put in charge of it. He decided that he wasn't going to lower himself to the standards of a common thief, just to line his pocket, so gave up on the idea of raiding the castle.

He decided to have a break in the inn, and think of a different quest.

As he ate his lunch, he overheard some farmers talking,

"They say it's as big as a jaguar."

"What's a jaguar?"

"A sort of silver-ish chariot, with five seats, I think."

"Chariots with five seats? It'll never catch on!"

"They also say that the beast is pitch black, so when it strikes at night, no one can see it."

"What beast would this be?" asked Synbios. Looks like he found his quest.

"The beast of Grail Mountain. It's been attacking farms over the last weeks. If we don't get rid of it, in time for the harvest, then we won't be able to pay the taxes to the Lord."

"But surely, he must understand about the beast." said Synbios. Born and bread as a typical fairy tale knight (not to mention a right goody two shoes) he believed that there was good in every living thing. "I'm sure he'd let you off, until you can get the money to pay."

The whole pub burst into laughter.

"You should do stand up mate!" said the farmer

"The lord letting us off! Priceless!"

"Where do you think we are? Flagard, under the rule of goody two shoes Synbios?

The blast of laughter seemed to increase in volume. Synbios stood proud. Red in the face, with clenched fists, but proud all the same.

"Take me to Grail Mountain." He said, "I'll see what I can do about the beast."

Again, the laughter got louder.

Synbios decided to ask elsewhere. He asked an elderly lady, on the street. That's always the best thing to do when you're lost. As the elderly can be very wise, and usually know the right way to go in life.

Back at Flagard, Dantares was going bananas, and loving every minute of it.

"Attention!" he roared. All the force stood to attention.

"Stand at ease!" he shouted. The force relaxed.

"Attention!" The force stood to attention

"Stand at ease!" they stood easy

"Attention! Stand at ease! Attention! Stand at ease! Attention! Stand at ease! Attention! Stand at ease!" they soldiers shook off their aching right feet.

"You're quite the worst bunch of nancy boys, and overgrown schoolgirls, that I've ever laid my eyes on! But," he paused impressively, "That is all going to change. We are going on a raid, of an Imperial castle!"

"But Dantares you can't do that without Lord Synbios' permission!" said Masqurin, a red haired elf girl.

"Shut up!" Dantares thundered for the thirteenth time in ten minutes, "Synbios will know nothing about this, as he is attending to urgent business in his office and has asked not to be disturbed until he is finished!"

The force gave a two finger salute when Dantares' back was turned

"And by the time he finishes," said the centaur as he turned to face the battalion, "You will be gone!" the force managed to replace their figures in time.

Synbios was walking up the mountain path. Well I'm not giving him much a choice really. I mean he can't exactly get on the Snowdon rack railway, if he's not even in Wales, can he?

IT was a lovely route. Lots of flowers were in full bloom. Which was a bit odd. One would expect the monsters lair to be a wasteland of a place that could only be salvaged by really good decorators.

"Well well well!" came a voice, from up ahead. There, standing in front of him, where two bandits, dressed in purple tunics, with green turbans.

"What have we here?" said one, "A travelling ponce by the looks of it."

"La-le-da twerps like him are usually pretty well trowsered!" and you can interpret that sentence anyway you like.

The duo drew their daggers. Synbios began to sweat. These two were clearly of an unstable state of mind. Well they must have been, I mean, who mixes green with purple? They're mad!

Synbios drew his sword. These two idiots clearly weren't going to be persuaded to change their wicked ways (or their fashion sense), so he had no choice but to fight.

One rule of being a street thug is to never bring a knife to a gun fight. But since guns have yet to be invented, the saying currently went 'never bring a dagger to a broadsword fight'. It does make sense though. Synbios' sword had a much longer range than the badly dressed bandit's knives, giving him a massive advantage. He stabbed one of them in both arms causing him to lose the use of them. That was really going to be a nuisance when he wanted to use the rest room.

The second crook ran at Synbios from behind. The republican did a super fast three-sixty twist, and before the bandit knew what was happening, he was flying through the air, falling one way, while his lower legs flew off in another direction.

Sliding his weapon back into its sheath, with a comfortable click, Synbios continued on his merry way.

"Come back!" called one of the fallen thieves, "We're not done yet!"

"Sorry old boy, but you've already been defeated. And since your friend has been disarmed, there's no point in continuing" and he marched proudly away.

A minute later, he burst into laughter, "De-feeted! Dis-armed! I've got to write those lines down!"

Dantares had lead the army to the imperial town of Montague.

"Right boys." said the four legged military man, "We'll lie low, until it gets dark. Then, when we get the signal, we creep into the castle, and swipe the loot."

"What's the signal?" asked Masqurin,

"Murasame," said Dantares, addressing the Murasame, the master of stealth, and the team's top spy, "I want you to sneak into the castle now, and find out where the money is kept. And when its nightfall, flash a torch, to let us know when to strike."

"Yes sir." Said Murasame

Synbios, meanwhile, had reached the top of the mountain. When, when I say the top, what I really mean, is that he reached the mart of the mountain, where the beast's lair was located. A big, dark cave loomed in front of our hero.

What perils await him? Will Dantares' raid be a success? Find out next time!


	3. The Raid

The Raid

Synbios stared into the dark abyss. Dark, shadowy and full of fear and trepidation. Gathering his courage, he stepped into the dark cave.

He heard a noise. A rustling sound. The sounds of movement. Synbios remembered that the beast was said to be pitch black, so would always have an edge in the dark.

Running back outside, our brave hero ducked behind some rocks.

He waited for the beast to show. The noise grew louder, and louder, until at last, the beast reviled itself.

"A black rabbit?" Synbios was in a state of words I can't seem to find in a dictionary. A rabbit. A small, furry, harmless rabbit, that would make girls melt at ten paces, was the beast.

Picking up the rodent in his arms, he headed back to the village.

"All that trouble was caused by a rabbit?" asked our hero

"Don't let his appearance fool you!" said the farmer, "He's the most cunning, foul tempered rodent you're ever likely to meet! He also has an unlimited appetite! Ate all my crops he did!"

Synbios handed the bunny to a little girl.

"Give him a good home, won't you?"

The girl smiled widely

"Thank you mister!" she said.

"Listen, you've done great, stopping the beast, from attacking the crops again, so why not stay for tea?" asked a farmer.

"Oh yes. I could do with a bit."

But then, a trumpet sounded.

"Its lord Montague!" cried a woman, "He's come for more taxes!"

The farmers stood in a line, like soldiers being inspected by their sergeant. Lord Montague was a lean, weasel-faced dipstick of a man.

"Well, you're not much to look at, are you?" sneered his lordship. "I'm going to have to invoke an 'Ugly tax'."

"But that's hardly fair, m'lord!" said a young farmer.

"Hardly fair, but fair all the same." said Montague "Pay up."

So they all dug deep, and handed their money over.

"Thank you. Oh by the way, that man is insolent, give him one hundred lashes."

"But your lordship, he didn't mean any harm!" said a young woman.

"Oh, and bring that girl to my bed chamber. I need something to do tonight anyway."

"Oh shit." groaned the woman, slapping her own forehead.

Montague then departed, with his prisoners in tow, and several bags of coins in his pocket.

"Now you see why he's so unpopular." said the older farmer.

"That's bullying, if ever I saw it." said Synbios, "Do you have enough money to pay the regular tax?"

"Not now, we don't. We were hoping that the money from the harvest would cover it, but thanks to the new ugly tax, we won't have enough money for…" he pondered. What else DID they need money for? "Other stuff."

"Well," said Synbios, "I'll have to do something about that." Looks like the raid was back on. All Synbios needed was a way to get into the castle undetected.

An Imperial soldier came into the pub, "A pint of mild please." He said, removing his helmet. You know what's going to happen. I know what's going to happen. So let's just get it over with.

"I'll get this one for you!" said Synbios, patting the soldier on the back.

The sun was setting. Dantares was scrapping the ground with one of his rear hoofs.

"Not long now lads." he said gruffly

"Don't be sexist!" said Cybell; a female centaur knight,

"I will be sexist, as I see fit, my girl!" said the commander, "There was a time when women had to stay in the kitchen and get the tea ready, under penalty of death!"

"Ah." sighed Obright, "those were the days. During the war…"

Everyone groaned

"My wife made a big breakfast of pancakes, before I set off to battle."

Hayward, a ranger elf was holding a frying pan over the campfire.

"What are you cooking?" asked Masqurin,

"Rats." said Hayward, "Want one?"

"That's disgusting!" squealed the girl

"Don't worry, these are the flavoured ones."

"Ooh! What flavours have you got?" she soon got the colour back in her cheeks,

"I've got Salt and Vinegar, Cheese and Onion, Prawn Cocktail, and Barbeque Beef." said the ranger,

"Prawn cocktail please!"

The Imperial soldier lay unconscious, on the bed. In a beer-coma, he'd be completely unmoveable until morning. And when he finally would wake up, he'd have a massive headache that would really slow him down. Even the queue at a fast food restaurant would move quicker than him. Synbios fastened the helmet onto his head, and pulled down the visor. In this disguise, he could steal the gold from under the lord's very nose.

The sun illuminated the sky gold and pink, as it slipped down beyond the horizon. The darkness filled the air. It was nearly time to strike. Murasame's torch pierced the darkness, showing Dantares that the time was right.

"Here we go everyone." He grinned, "Hi-ho away."

"Hi-ho. Hi-ho. It's off to work we go!" they sang

"With a shovel and a pick, and a Walking stick!" sang Grace,

"With a cat, in a hat, The Emperor is fat!" added Hayward

"We're getting on his wick, cause Dantares is a prick!" continued Masqurin,

"Hi-Ho! Hi-Ho! Hi-Ho! Hi-Ho!" finished the entire platoon.

"Shut up!" hissed the angry Dantares, at reduced volume, and prolonging the vowels.

Synbios was walking through the corridor of Castle Montague. He was hoping that sooner or later, he'd find the chamber where the loot was hidden. This could take all night. He could march down the corridors for days, and he still come no closer to finding the money. He could spend months coming back to the castle, and still have no luck.

Or he could just turn right, into where a sign read 'Treasure room'.

Well, he'd found it. A room full of coin bags. There was also a rope attached to a bell. It looked like a sort of burglar alarm.

Synbios collected two large bags, took off his blue chest plate and hid the bags under his tunic, covering his upper torso. As soon as he put the chest plate back off, he heard the door opening behind him. 'Shit!' he though, 'I've been rumbled!'

There, in the doorway, were several figures dressed in cloaks. They were led by a large centaur.

"Get him!" said the centaur. The figures were obviously thieves, come for the treasure themselves.

The figures jumped on Synbios, in a dog pile, with fists flying everywhere. These men and women were quite strong, and since Synbios was outnumbered, there was only one thing to do.

He jumped towards the alarm bell, and rang it, as if it were Bart Simpson's neck. The thieves jumped on him again. Sixty seconds of punching and screaming later, and the entire platoon of castle guard burst into the room.

The soldiers charged into action, ramming into the bandits. Total chaos ha broken out. Synbios used the cover of the melee, to sneak out of the chamber.

The bandits were now in the centre of the chamber. "This isn't going according to plan." said Dantares. What a twit he would have felt, if he'd known that the soldier he and the force attacked, and who had rang the bell, was in fact, Synbios.

Before the centaur had time to devise an escape plan, a large net was dropped on the force, trapping.

"Grab the magic users!" ordered one soldier, "Bind and gag them as quickly as you can! The rest of you, start putting the others in chains!"

Oh yes. What a twit Dantares felt.

Synbios had returned to the in.

"Weren't you a man earlier?" asked the farmer,

"What do you mean?"

"Those…um…" the farmer began to look uncomfortable, "They weren't there earlier."

"Oh, I'll show you." said Synbios, removing his tunic

The farmer turned red in the face, and ran for the door.

"Two bags of gold!" said our hero,

"First time I've ever heard that term for them."

"This should keep you out of jail until you can grow another harvest." said the Republican,

"Thank you." said the farmer, taking the bags, "Now everything's peachy!"

An Imperial soldier came into the pub, "Drinks all round! I feel like celebrating!"

"So may I ask what's brought upon this good mood?" asked the barman, handing the soldier the thick sweet brew.

"We've just caught some thieves, trying to steal from the Lord's treasury. It's a good job we heard the alarm bell." explained the soldier.

Synbios sniggered.

"And what's more," continued the jolly guard, "One of my mates says that they look like the army of Lord Synbios."

Our hero turned very white.

"He said that the centaur leading the thieves bares a strong resemblance to Sir Dantares of the Republic.

Here we go again. Synbios walked over to the soldier.

"Let me buy you a drink!" he offered.

"Well this is another fine mess you've gotten us into, Stanley." said Obright

"Oh shut up." said Dantares, "If you're going to criticise me, then at least get my name right."

"Well we all warned you about raiding an Imperial stronghold." said Cybell

"Murph Mumph!" came a muffled agreement, from the cell next door.

"Shut up, Masqurin."

Lord Montague arrived, in his polka dot pyjamas and peered into the cells. Magicians tied up in one cell, with cloths over their mouths, and the rest chained together in the other cell.

"You must be feeling a right bunch of nitwits!" gloated his lordship.

"Do you expect us to talk?" said Dantares defensively.

"Oh no Mr Bound, I expect you to…wait a minute, I know you don't I?"

Dantares retreated to the back of the cell. If he was recognised, it was all over.

"What do you plan to do with us?" asked Obright,

"Well, I'm going to set up the torture chamber." said the lord, a little too cheerfully, "Come morning, you will be subjected to torture so gruesome, painful, and horrific, that even the man who operates the guillotine will feel queasy and ask to leave the room."

"One thing I'll say about British justice," smiled Hayward, "You always get a fair trial!"

Synbios was back in the earlier dilemma. Searching the castle for the prison. It could take hours, days, and weeks even. Or he could just follow the sign posts again. Yes it is the same joke as earlier. Please don't lynch me.

He entered the prison wing.

"Oh look." Said Dantares, "It's a blue armoured git. You so-called guards are a bunch of pansies! Do your worst, you buck-toothed, toffee-nosed pencil-necked plonker! But I doubt that a girly-armed little twerp like you could do very much with your weak stomachs!"

Synbios removed the helmet. Dantares face became similar to a fish that caught a glimpse of John West smirking at him.

"You've got some explaining to do!" Synbios nearly yelled, affecting an Italian accent.

Rather than tell Ricky that he wanted to be in the show, Dantares stood firm, with a pale face.

"I thought it would be a good exercise sir. You see…"

"Never mind." Groaned the leader, "You can explain later. Right now, we have to get out of here."

Using his sword, Synbios broke the locks on the two cell doors. As the magic users were untied, footsteps were heard.

"He's coming back!"

"Hide!" ordered Synbios

Lord Montague came back into the chamber.

"Forgot my keys." He said to himself. A magician's rod whacked him on the head.

When Montague awoke, he was attached to a rack. Many cloaked figures stood over him.

"Time for a taste of your own medicine." Said the hooded Synbios, affecting a strong cockney accent. He pulled a handful of ice cubes out of his cloak, as the others removed Montague's shoes. A cloth was wrapped around his mouth as the cubes where pressed against his feet, and attached to them, with ropes. A suppressed howl passed Montague's lips, and crashed into the brick wall that was the gag.

Synbios and his troops tip-toed out of the castle, and raced home, before Montague could be set free.

To be continued


	4. Dragon Hunter

Dragon Hunter

Dantares was in jail. Synbios court marshalled him, for the raid. Soon, Synbios entered the cell,

"Now listen to me Dantares," said Synbios with a look that could kill, stuff and mount, "What the _hell_ do you mean by leading a raid without my permission?"

"I was only trying to help with the financial crisis, Lord Synbios." said the centaur,

"Our financial situation is _my_ responsibility!"

"I am sorry Synbios, it was wrong of me to take matters into my own hands, but wouldn't it be better if we put the rest of the force in the picture?"

Synbios thought about it. It would be easier if his team knew what he was up to.

"I must meditate upon the matter further. Right now, I have no choice but to release you.",

"So all is forgiven, my Lord?",

"Of course not. If you're in jail, then everyone will know that you led that raid. I'll think up a suitable punishment later."

"Yes sir." Said Dantares.

Meanwhile, in Destonia, the heart of the mighty Destonia Empire, Emperor Domeric was giving an audience to a lean weasel-faced dipstick of an angry man,

"This is an outrage!" shouted Lord Montague, "Tied to a rack, with ice cubes strapped to my feet! And whatsmore, a female bandit dropped a large lump between my legs!"

"A large lump?" said the Emperor, remembering that the last big lump to drop between his legs resulted in the princes being born.

"Yes! A large lump of ice!"

"And you say they were Republicans?" continued the Fat Controller of the Empire

"Yes! One of my men says that they looked similar to the army of Lord Synbios!"

"Synbios!" roared the Emperor, beginning a fit of rage, at the mention of that name, "Well if that little twerp of a prat of do-gooder wants a fight, then that's just what he'll get!"

He rang a bell, summoning a servant,

"Prepare my coach! We'll head over to Aspia, and give Synbios, and that fool King Bentram a piece of my mind!"

"May I accompany you farther?" asked Mageron; eldest of the Emperor's four children, and the definite favourite of his wide-ness.

"For what reason do you want to accompany me, to see Bentram?" asked the Emperor,

"No reason," said Mageron, as he fiddled with his moustache, "I just want to sneer at his furniture."

Later, Synbios was reading the newspaper, trying to work out another quest. The trouble with doing this in secret was that he couldn't travel very far from home, to make sure no one noticed him missing. Suddenly, he saw an interesting article. A dragon had been sighted near the volcanic hole located between Flagard and Aspia! This was just the sort of thing Synbios was looking for! Slaying a dragon was the pinnacle of a knight's accomplishments, and whatsmore, dragons usually guarded treasure. So that would be a great financial aid.

Synbios found Dantares,

"Dantares, ready my horse (whose name is Alan)! We're going hunting for dragons!",

"We?" said the centaur,

"Yes," said the lord, "I'm not leaving you lead the force to war, again!"

In the damaged city of Aspia, the once proud capital of the republic, King Bentram, the good and noble monarch, received a letter, via homing pigeon,

"Great fires of London! Emperor Domeric is coming here! He's demanding to speak to both myself, and Lord Synbios!"

"Do you suspect that he's plotting something, your majesty?" asked a servant,

"Possibly. I can't imagine any other reason for him demanding an audience. I must pass on the message to Synbios with great haste. According to the letter, Domeric should arrive by midday tomorrow."

"Shall we send a pigeon, your Highness?",

"No, I think we'll just fox him. Get my fox machine ready."

The servant handed Bentram a box, which he placed on the table. The monarch then took out a quill and parchment, and wrote his message. Sliding the parchment into the box, he pressed the 'send' button. A small fox jumped out of the box, and darted off towards Flagard.

"The miracles of modern technology are amazing." Said the impressed servant,

"They are, aren't they?" replied Bentram, "But I can't help wonder weather can I stay online, without a dedicated line, if I receive a fox."

Synbios led the daring duo of Dantares, and himself to the cave, riding on his mighty horse (whose name was Alan). In mere moments, they arrived at the entrance to the cave.

"Imagine the exploits of that famous dragon hunter." said Synbios, "A Pioneer, Dantares, we share his spirit!"

"You are correct Synbios." Replied the centaur, "We're doing something similar to that great hero."

Then, a mighty rush of wind, howled through the air. Our heroes, turned to see a massive crimson reptile, with arms replaced with the wings of a bat. The duo ducked as the monster sailed overhead, into the cave.

"Crikey!" cried Synbios, "It's a lesser-spotted red wyvern!" Dantares noticed that Synbios was now affecting an accent similar to that a lively Australian,

"Supposedly, the scariest dragon of its species! Let's follow it!",

"Why are you talking like that, Synbios?" inquired his companion,

"Because the legendry Dragon Hunter spoke like this!" said Synbios, still in Australian, "We share the bloke's spirit, remember?"

"Out of curiosity, what was the Dragon Hunter's name?"

"Sir Steven Erwin."

Then Synbios darted off after the Dragon.

"We're doomed…." groaned Dantares.

Back at base, Synbios army were practising with long-range weapons.

"You may not believe this," said Cybel, "But a skilled marksman can slice a piece of wood in half, with an arrow!"

"I can do that." Said Heyward,

"Wow, cool!" cried Masqurin.

The grass-haired elf walked over to a plank of wood, on the ground, and shot it, at point-blank range.

"How impressive." groaned the sarcastic Cybel,

The red wyvern, had curled up, ready for a hard earned sleep. Being an arsonist is tiring work. And after a hard day of burning stuff to the ground, nothing beats coming home to a big bed of gold coins, to rest on.

"Right, he's asleep. Let's grab some coins, and get out of here." said Synbios, opening a purse.

"Are you absolutely sure, he's asleep?" asked Dantares,

"That's a good point." said Synbios. He turned to face something moving, that had caught the corner of his eye, "Do you think he's asleep?" he asked.

Then he realised that the answer would definitely have been "No I'm bloody well not, you noisy thieving bastard."

"Oh, crikey…" said our heroes. Next thing they knew, they were darting towards the entrance of the cave, with an angry dragon hot on their tails. Literally. Dantares' deep centurion baritone was rendered to a high-pitched shriek, as his tail was set alight, the beast's fiery breath. At the speed he was running, the ember on his tail was like the discharge from a jet engine.

The duo were reaching the entrance, and the dragon was reaching its prey. They ducked, as the wyvern flew overhead, and into the skies, towards Flagard.

"We've got to get back, and stop that dragon!" said Synbios, worried for his countrymen, "We've got the get down the mountain! I could use my sword to carve a pair of horse-skis for you, and I can use my shield as a bob-sledge! Then we run at the gradient as fast as we can, and ride to the bottom! I'll saddle up on Alan and race back to Flagard!"

"Or we could just use egress magic." said the centaur

"Or we could use egress magic…" said the human.

For those of you unfamiliar with this, it is a tradition that the brave warriors who lead the Shining Force be taught this powerful spell. It is only to be used in an emergency, as warps the boundaries of time and space, to transport the hero and his friends to the nearest house of warship. As mentioned, it is only to be used in an emergency. Like when fighting in a losing battle, and the general is about to be skewered. Or a rampaging dragon is on its way to your village. Or if you're late for mass.

The cry of the mighty flying reptile filled the air, and its shadow cast a blanked of darkness across the town square.

"Crikey!" cried the battalion.

Synbios and Dantares raced onto the scene.

"Alright everyone! We've got to stop that dragon!"

"What's your strategy?" asked Obright,

"First, we'll attack at a distance, with arrows, and magic, then melee fighters with swords, lances, and axe's move in, and do as much damage as possible."

"Oh, that tactic's for beginners!" said Masqurin, "Watch this." She walked over to the dragon, with her magician's rod.

"Oh sprit of thunder, I call upon you to grant me your aid…" the rod began to glow, as Masqurin chanted the spell.

"Sparkling Thunder!" she cried with a mighty blast of neon lightning pouring from her weapon and smashing into the red wyvern.

The mighty dragon gave a terrible shriek, and fell to the ground, smoke rising from all over.

"Easy as pie." Said the elf.

Dantares, Cybel, and a scruffy archer centaur called Justin tied ropes around the dragon, and dragged it away.

Synbios was just sneaking out of the city walls, to head back to the volcanic hole, when the butler ran over, "Milord, a fox has just come in for you."

He handed it over. The fox tried to bite him.

"Great fires of London! Emperor Domeric wants to see me and the king!"

That night, Synbios was pacing up and down in his chamber. Dantares came in.

"That's a very serious look, you have on your face." he said,

"I can't see this meeting with the Emperor going well." said the Lord, "I'm ninety nine point nine thousand nine hundred and ninety nine percent sure that he's coming because of that raid."

"I understand that this is most likely a bad time to bring this up, but have you given anymore thought to filling the others in, regarding our financial crisis?"

"You're right. I can't go on like this forever. I'll hold a meeting, first thing after I return from Aspia."

To be continued


	5. War!

War! By Truro

"I thought you wanted to call the meeting after we returned from Aspia." said Dantares,

"I did, but I won't be able to concentrate, unless I get this monkey off my back.",

"That's enough piggy-backing for now, Rock.", said Dantares, poking the gorilla with the pole of his spear.

"How many did I drink last night?" groaned the gorilla, scratching his head.

The army of Synbios were called to headquarters; an outpost, on the corner of the city gates of Flagard, often rented out as a venue for engagement parties. Synbios sat at the head of the table with Dantares at his side. The last of Synbios' forces to arrive was Grace; a priestess of Kyantol breeding, with a vast knowledge of healing techniques.

"I apologise for my lateness Lord Synbios." She apologised.

"It's perfectly all right Grace, as we're all glad to have you back with us again." said Synbios,

"Thank you my lord. My little holiday to the hot springs was lovely."

"Did you take a lot of pictures?"

"If you'll pardon me, Synbios," Dantares interrupted "Had we not best start the meeting?"

"Oh yes, of course."

So an offended Grace took her seat, and the meeting began.

"I'm quite sure that the events of our crusade to destroy the Bulzome sect, are still fresh in you minds?" Synbios began. This was greeted by mutters of affirmation.

Synbios was now having trouble finding his voice, "Well, I regret to inform you, that I had to empty the coffers to fund the expedition." Gasps of fear filled the air.

"I fear," continued the lord, "that unless we can get some money back in them, it'll be…" he lost the words again. How could he break it to them? "Mass lay-offs."

The entire building was in an uproar, "Oh no! It's Order sixty six!"

Everyone was talking at once. Synbios tried to get everyone's attention, "Everyone…" the noise continued. "Everyone!" he said a bit louder. The noise still continued.

"SHUT UP!" roared Dantares. Silence filled the air. The centaur grinned, and metaphorically handed over to Synbios.

"Thank you." said the boss, "Now, there's no danger of unemployment yet, as we've managed to get some money in the coffers, from our little adventure at castle Montague." All eyes turned to Dantares.

"What are you looking at?"

"And since we've captured the Red Wyvern, its treasure is up for grabs. Cybil and Justin are to go to the cave with wagons. Load them up with the loot and bring it back here."

"Oh, I hate climbing rocky hills!" Cybil moaned,

"And I hate, listening to winging little girls!" snorted Dantares, "Just do as you're told!"

"Now, now." said Synbios, "Dantares and I are required at an audience, with Emperor Domeric, due to the raid. Talk of those events must not pass beyond these walls. If the Emperor finds out that we really did lead a raid on one of his castles, he'll have the excuse he needs to bring us to war again."

And so, Synbios and Dantares began their trek to the capital. When they reached the city walls of the crown jewel in the nation's crown, the gates slowly opened. The pair made their way towards the castle. Republican and Imperial soldiers, engaged in great starring contests all through the town.

Synbios horse (whose name was Alan) was tied by the reins in Synbios parking space; One of the perks of being a lord.

They entered the counsel chamber.

"That's him!" shouted the Emperor, "Pay up you vermin, you! Pay up!"

"Please calm yourself, Emperor." Said Bentram.

"I am calm." said Domeric, "If I wasn't, then I wouldn't simply be demanding to be compensated! I have levelled entire cities for less!"

"First of all, what are you basing these suspicions on?" asked Synbios,

"Lord Montague of Montague informs me that one of the bandits who raided his castle was the spitting image of Sir Dantares!"

"As you can see, your Majesty, we are innocent of such crimes. If Dantares had lead this robbery, then he would be in a prison cell, for going against my orders." Said Synbios. The Emperor grew dark and broody, listening to the boy's lies, all the while, his son sneering at the furniture.

"And you honestly expect me to believe that?" said the fatso,

"I have given my word." said Synbios,

"Normally that would be sufficient, but you are a terrible liar! Even a man who farted and tried to blame it on the only other person in the room, would have a better chance of succeeding than you! Come Mageron! We prepare for war!",

"Oh goody!" said the prince, following his farther out of the room. Then he popped his head back in the room, to take one last sneer at the table, before the trip home.

Synbios felt like we wanted to collapse. He was always an honest man, who had hardly spoke a word of untruth in his life. And now, thanks to his petty little money problems, he had brought the kingdom to war.

"What made you do it?" asked King Bentram,

"It was my fault." said Dantares, "Flagard is facing a great financial crisis, and I sought out to solve it. Synbios came to rescue us, after we were captured. If I ever get my hands on the soldier who sounded that alarm bell, I'll smash up his bike. I'll stomp on his spectacles, and through his bicycle clips down the drain."

"That will do Dantares." said sweaty Synbios,

"If all you needed was money, then why didn't you just come to me? I would have been more than happy to lend you some."

"We thought you had enough on your plate, without having to be involved in our problem."

Bentram sighed. "What sort of King would I be, if I didn't see to it, that my people were doing well?"

"I'm sorry your Majesty. Is the offer of a loan still open?" asked the swordsman,

"Is it hell! You had your chance, and you've blown it by bringing us to war! I'm very cross! I shall punish you with a good old fashioned slipper-thrashing!"

A guard came in. He had terrible news. But he almost forgot, as he stood shocked at the sight of Synbios draped over Bentram's lap, while the King hammered his backside with one of his slippers. Synbios screamed, as Dantares tried not to laugh.

"Is there anything you wish?" asked the king,

"Oh yes sire. The Imperial soldiers has begun to attack our guards!"

Synbios leapt to his feet.

"Don't worry sire! I'll save you from the Empire-again! Come Dantares! To battle!"

And they ran off before Bentram could say 'Classic Beano punishment.'

Cybil and Justin were about to reach the top of the mountain road.

"I don't believe this!" Cybil whined, "Hauling goods about!",

"What are you complaining about?" said Justin, "I'm the one pulling the cart."

"That's not the point! We centaurs are a noble race! Pulling trucks around is an unfitting task, for such a large, powerful, splendid and beautiful creature as myself! I'd rather be pulling a coach any day!",

"Have you been reading Thomas the Tank engine again?",

"How dare you?!" she snapped, "How dare you accuse me of reading something so childish!"

Her face was red, and her eyes were blazing.

"It was Gordon the Big Engine, for your information!"

The battle at Aspia castle gates was raging fiercely. Four brave soldiers were defending themselves against the blows of the Imperial axes, with their halberds. Their green armour was worn and covered with marks, from swords banging against it.

"We're not doing too well." Said one, as the four of them stood with their backs to the doors.

"Don't worry lads." Said another, "We won't go down without a fight. Char-"

Within half a syllable the doors burst open, knocking the four men against the walls. Synbios and Dantares, charged at the blue-armoured soldiers, with their weapons glinting in the mid-day sun, and the totally cool Republican battle-theme blaring in the background.

Synbios ran though the crowd of Imperials, flailing his sword around, in a clumsy but effective manner, and Dantares charged through them with his lance, like a green torpedo.

Bodies, and bits of armour were flying all over the place. Many a magic spell was cast by rouge magicians, causing Dantares' tail to catch fire, for the second time.

"Not again!" he screamed, crashing into a large group of Imperial centaur knights.

Quick as a flash, Synbios leapt onto a barber shop quartet of soldiers, slamming them into the ground. Then he pounced at the next cluster of Imperials, ravaging them, like a mad tiger.

Dantares recovered from his fire emergency, and made beeline for the commander of the forces.

Blue armour flew through the air, at the sheer force of the centaur's charge. Dantares was the Flaggard army's largest, fastest, and most powerful centaur, and a tackle from him was like being hit by a truck.

Before the commander could say 'I'm doomed...' Dantares smashed into him, sending him soaring into the city wall, his armour bursting off him, like a rocket, exploding on impact.

From the safety of his armoured carriage, in the Imperial convoy, bound back to Destonia to devise war plans, Emperor Domeric watched the carnage.

"They're losing aren't they?" he asked.

"I'm afraid so, Father." said Mageron.

"I really must remember to bring larger invasion forces, next time I declare war on a country. I'm going to have to just admit to not being quite a size twenty four soldiers dictator."

The smoke of the battle began to die out. Bentram approached the exhausted Synbios.

"Well," began the king, "We are now in some very hot water."

"My king," said Synbios, "I got us into this mess, and I vow, upon what remains of my honour, to get us out."

"That's good." Bentram smiled. "Because I'm enlisting your for a series of special missions, during the upcoming war." he put a gentle hand on Synbios' shoulder.

"Synbios, you served me well, during the war with the Bulzome sect, and you must do so again."

Synbios nodded his head. "To regain my honour, and defend my country, I place myself at your disposal."

"Excellent. Your first task shall be to establish several command posts, on the borders of the Republic. from there, we can be ready for any Imperial attacks. I'll just get you the money you'll need."

"No need for that sir." said Synbios. "My forces discovered treasure in the cave, near Falggard. By now, Cybil and Just should be back in Flaggard with enough gold to fortify the Kingdom."

"Tell me again, how they captured us, Cybil?"

"I don't want to talk about it"

To be continued.


End file.
